Random Questions

All asked by D on Wednesday:

D: "Why did he get cut with a knife?" - While driving and listening to Cuts Like a Knife by Bryan Adams.
Me: "His feelings got hurt and it feels like getting cut but, NOBODY is cutting anybody with a knife"
D: "OK Mommy"

D: "What's a freak?" - While driving and listening to Raise Your Glass by Pink, which she has heard a thousand times before.
Me: : "It's a not nice name for someone who is different. You should never call someone a freak, it's very mean."
D: " OK Mommy. What's for lunch?"

D: "What do the angels do with the babies?" Completely out of the blue while eating lunch.
Me: (Stunned silence) " I don't know honey, but I hope it's very nice and that the angels take good care of the babies."
D: "OK Mommy"

flowers

I seem to only have one mode lately, tired. I know, it's not really unexpected for me to be tired right now, but summer is going to end soon (I do live in the great frozen North) and I shouldn't spend the nicest time of the year sleeping (and neglecting my blogs.)

My cousin's wedding was okay for the most part. The center pieces at the reception (and the party the day after) were red gerbera daisies. I know that the choice had nothing to do with me or Reid, but it was still nice to see them everywhere. I tried to tell my aunt (the bride's mom) this but I could barely get the words our between sobs (The hormones are definitely kicking in.) She already knew that I associate red gerbera daisies with Reid, so she wasn't confused as to why I was blubbering over the flowers.

The other blog

So if anyone wants to check it out (and I won't be hurt if you don't or can't) my subsequent pregnancy blog is here: Hello Thing 3.

16 Months

Well yesterday was and it was one of the hardest days I have in ages. I broke down crying in the middle of trying to make lunch. (I can't remember the last time I broke down crying without there being a specific reason.) Stress, hormones, Reid's anniversary and everything else are wearing me down. I find myself wishing for a weekend alone in my bed, you know like the "good old days", a year ago when the pain was new and raw. I always miss my baby boy, but right now it feels like the ache and desperate longing has returned.

Long ago and far away

D's birthday is on Tuesday. I am exhausted from the party preparations (I can't help but go a little overboard for her birthday) but a little freaked out too. We found I was pregnant with Reid right after D's birthday 2 years ago which means this is the start of thinking of everything that happened while I was pregnant with Reid as "2 years ago". It seems so long ago when you say it that way.