Tuesday, December 14, 2010

In the mail

Last night, D and I finished all the Christmas cards for D.G.'s family and packed everything up to send to his mom's house. I thought that avoiding Christmas shopping would help me avoid the pain but I was wrong. Every time I attached a gift tag to a envelope and had to write " D..., C... and D..." instead of "D..., C..., D... and Reid", it was another knife in my chest. All these pretty, shiny envelopes and all I could see was what was missing from those tiny little tags. Screw this whole happy, shiny month.


On a "happier" note, I finished Amanda's ornament for Stella and packed it up too. I have no idea if it's going to make it to her in time, but I wasn't willing to pay $60 bucks to mail a 5 oz. package to ensure that it would. (Seriously that was an option.)


We have now received 7 Christmas cards. I've only had the guts to open 3 of them and only one has any personal message about how this is not going to be a happy holiday for us. It may be December 26th before I open any more.


Missy said...

I have received 5 cards and the only personal message was in the one from a fellow baby loss mom. I fear not a one will have a remembrance message and I may just turn colder than I ever was. Reaching out to hold your hand!

Jessica said...

(((Hugs))) to you <3

Lareina said...

I'm glad you got the cards done and dealt with... Those firsts are never easy. I said screw it last year and put all 4 names on everything, even the gift tags... I figured it's not my problem if they're uncomfortable, but that's me. Everyone deals with it differently and I'm glad you got through it okay.

Still thinking of you and praying for your wish to come true. Big hugz!

My New Normal said...

We have only received 3 cards so far and one had a personal message in it. To be honest, I don't expect many more personal messages mostly because I think people are lazy when they fill out their cards and just put the same thing for everyone or get those pre-printed ones.

We decided not to skip Christmas this year (the first since losing our son in August). Instead, we got two ornaments with his name on them and put them on the tree first. Of course I cried, but for us it felt right. To honor him and make him part of our family Christmas.

Hang in there, we all only have a few more weeks to go before the holiday season is over.

Dana said...

I'm glad you got the cards for D.G's cards done. Christmas just sucks this year. It should have been so, so different.

Sending you love.

Amanda said...

I'm glad you didn't spend $60 to mail the ornament! I can't wait to see it and hang it on the tree. Thank you again.

And of all the cards we've received so far only 2 have mentioned anything about thinking of us or wishing us a better 2011. Ugh.

Angela said...

I received a card yesterday from a "friend." No personal message, just a picture of her little girl born eight days before Charlotte. She didn't contact me after she died, but she sent me that card? Ouch.

I think you're smart to ignore the cards.

Jessica said...

BTW $60 is INSANE! AS for Christmas cards not ONE I have received from people I know in real life has even mentioned my babies. I have received several BLM cards and I cherish seeing that people remember Rilay & Peyton!

Ava's mummy said...

I am sorry that there were no messages for your beautiful baby. It hurts doesn't it. I have been known to bin cards before if they don't acknowledge Ava (I am not a good person clearly!). Sending much love and strength to you and remembering Reid with all the other precious and much missed babies.

B said...

oh not one of our cards last year acknowledged our 25 november loss, except possibly the ones from my mum and D's mum which don't exactly count. shitty isn't it?

angela i would be tempted to rip that photo up and return it. how horribly cruel.