Tuesday, May 7, 2013

Nothing like waking up to a knife in the chest

I sleep with the radio on. It's a habit left over from the early days after Reid died when I woke up so frequently and needed a distraction to keep my from spending my nights sobbing uncontrollably in the dark. This morning I woke up to an older woman's voice talking about her memories of her mom. ( Some type of story about Mothers Day I assume.) the first thing I heard clearly was: "My mother had 5 children including one stillborn baby. She was under general anesthesia and my father said 'Put it in the furnace.' So between my father and the doctors and the nurses, she never got to see her baby. "
Now I'm laying head my heart aching for my baby and all the millions of mothers who were never allowed to see and hold their babies. Who were told to move on and forget and didn't have the Internet and blogs to help them find each other in the early hours of the morning. I just want my baby boy.

1 comment:

Lisa Sissons said...

The ache is so very real. I also find myself thinking of the people who lost their babies and were forced to move on with their lives because it was not socially acceptable to grieve them.