Sunday, April 3, 2011

Reid's First Birthday

Preparations for the birthday celebration started on Saturday afternoon when we decorated luminaries. I admit I did most of the them but D and D.G. both helped too. We lit them just before D went to bed so she could see them all lit up and we kept them burning until just after the time of Reid's delivery 1 year ago. It was very hard watching the clock move toward 1:24 am, but it felt right to be awake for that time.

We woke up at the usual time, re-lit 2 of the luminaries and as promised, ate chocolate cupcakes for breakfast. D sang Happy Birthday to Reid all by herself and it was so sweet, I barely held it together.

We spent most of the morning doing random things around the house and then got dressed and went for lunch at the conservatory in the city. Right now indoors is the only place where you can find live flowers around here but luckily for us it wasn't too busy. We took many pictures of the amazing plants and flowers and D enjoyed being able to run around without a jacket and mittens on.

We came home and had a little rest, then went back outside to enjoy the sunshine. We released 3 balloons from our very snowy backyard and watched them until they disappeared into the sky.

For Reid, our little boy and baby brother. We love you and miss you so much and hope that wherever you are, you know that we carry you with us always.
Love, Mom, Dad and D.

It worked out that tonight was the monthly support group meeting, so while D.G. and D. hung out at home, I took cupcakes to share with some more of the lovely women who have helped get me through the last year. There were tears and laughter (actually, there was lots of laughter considering why we were all there) and it was a good way to end the day.


Merry said...

Thought of you all day. I hope our candle carried a little extra love to Reid.


Jeanette said...

I'm glad Reid's day passed peacefully for you. The candles are lovely, and the cup cakes look delicious.x

Megan said...

I have never known what to say to you since you told us last year. I remember the words you said to me and held them and my child tight like you said. Saying what I was feeling for you , the sadness, the heartbreaking emptiness seemed like nothing compared to what you were going through. I also felt like I might be one of the last people on the planet you might want to hear from. So I have silently read your blog. I felt like saying anything would make it worse- which seems stupid to say because how could it be worse, but I never wanted to upset you more. I have cried with you, and wondered about the unfairness of it all. I have also truly admired the never ending grace and strength you and the ladies here show every single day. I wish you were celebrating Reid's birthday in another way. I wish you all were. I just wanted you to know since you seem to feel differently sometimes that you and Reid ARE REMEBERED! Even by people you have probably never thought did. I have never forgotten you, you both have a place in my heart. I do apologize if my speaking up does cause you pain in any way. I just wanted to know many people are thinking of you both and remember.
Megan (failene from CPO)

Big Love, Big Acceptance - or so I say said...

All of your activities in memory of Reid sound so achingly beautiful to me. I read this and sense feelings of tenderness, openness, vulnerability and deep deep love.

Thinking of you, Reid, DG and D. Much love to each of you.

Ed said...

Thinking of you. Take care, dear.

Merry said...

What a lovely thing to write :)

brianna said...

Found your blog through LFCA. Just wanted to send my condolences on this first anniversary. Anniversaries are so difficult. Hope you had some peaceful times.

Amanda said...

Cara, I'm so sorry I missed Reid's birthday. It looks like you did an amazing job remembering him. So special. I hope you and your family are finding peace this spring. Big hugs.